Handjobs Are Bleak Unless You Have Some Lube, Then They Can Be Pretty Decent, It Mainly Comes Down to Technique, I Guess

by Fanny Leech

i’ve never had a problem
with friction and handjobs.
this is probably due to the fact
that my palms get sweaty
when i’m excited or nervous.
i can’t think of a time
when i haven’t been
at least one of those things
while giving a handjob.

sweat is a natural lubricant.

anyway, i’ve never heard a complaint
from anyone on the receiving end.
to be honest, holding hands
poses a bigger challenge
for people like me,
particularly if the other participant
is also prone to hand sweat.

in grade school, i learned boys
don’t like holding hands with
a girl with sweaty palms,
especially during mass.
the lead up to the ‘our father’
was the worst.

eventually,
i learned to cover my hands
with my sleeves
to create a barrier
between our skins.

i’ve imagined giving
handjobs to some of those boys now.
i cover my hands with wool
or scratchy sweaters
and rub and rub.



Fanny Leech would like nothing more than to be sucked dry.